Rihanna is See-Through
It somehow eludes most female celebrities that a flashbulb makes black fabric transparent. Just like AIDS has somehow eluded Magic Johnson, even though he’s been HIV positive for 18 goddamn years. I have several theories, all of which involve Spiro T. Agnew, the CDC, and actual magic, but I’m not at liberty to divulge them until all my stuff makes it through customs and I finally assume my new life as Maria Conchita Alonza de la Piedad de Cavadas. I’ve probably already said too much.
Rihanna + black tank top + flash = nipple rings: